想寫就寫

好久沒寫部落格了。也好久沒用華語寫東西了。 

今天，放假中。雖然說是考前的讀書假。但卻沒甚麼衝勁。 

想起中學的生活了我。想起當年無暇的我了。 

也許是時間作祟，也許是社會不一樣了。 

我， 長大了。

再也記不起當年到底唱過甚麼歌。 

再也記不起當年那些人。 

再也記不起當年受過的傷害。 

一切從來了。

過年時，和凱恆,joshua,子賢，顯耀出去。 

好像回到了旧時光。 但就是有那麼一點點的不同. 

今天，想找回以前一首我們都很努力練習的比賽歌。 

但，怎麼也想不起那旋律。更不記得歌名。 

聽了一遍又一遍，練了一遍又一遍，那麼熟悉但卻又被忘記。 

那，代表甚麼呢? 它對我來說已經無關緊要了嗎? 

那天，聽說老師出車禍了。但我卻在一年後才知道。 

這，又代表了甚麼。 從一開始就沒被注重過。

也證明，我當時的無知。 

從她口中敘述的你，看來還在逃避。 堅持讓人家相信，從頭到尾都是我的錯。 

只是，這已經不重要。 因為，我們所活在的時空，早就平行了。  

因為你，我放棄了許多。因為你，我從來沒享受過交朋友的自由。 

但，這是我的選擇。 如今，我選擇了放棄，選擇了自由 。平行的時空，是如此的靠近，也如此的距離。 

現在，我的他，是我的唯一，也是唯一對我呵護備至的人。 是你，促手不及的幻影。 

＝曾經錯過的我＝  

Love

Had a great valentines date yesterday ~~~!

i feel proud of me and sachin. that we don't have to be closer on valentines day. 

because its how close we are everyday. 

Last saturday we went to Seoul Garden in Gurney to have dinner. 

Actually the plan was going to italiannies in gurney paragon but its full ~~~ 

But its alright, so we headed to gurney. 

Spend 3 hours jus eatingggg.... OMG we're like piggsss~~~ hahaha

Then we headed home. i was thinking. shit. we're like old couples dee..... 

that time was. 11 something. so early weiii..... then we watched spirited away and he fall asleep halfway.

Potong betul. 

On valentines day, we went on a movie date. starwars 3D. the whole cinema. 5 people. WTF.

and after the show. i know why. because the 3d effect sucks. 

then we met up with yiwen they all who went to single "party" and ended up in tea garden~~~~ 

Really really had fun ~~!! 

Happy Chinese New Year~~~~~~

Its Chinese New Year nw so i wish all my friends and family member a Happy Dragon Year~~ 

Its been 2 years since i celebrated CNY at home. 

It felt jus right. Despite having class during cny for the past 2 years~~ =)

Had family reunion dinner with grandma, uncle don and aunt may~~ 

But grandma went back to Melacca after the dinner~~ 

Went to my mother's side family gathering and it was awesome~~!! 

I tot the family tradition of gathering together had lost but it has proven me wrong. 

All the loved ones gathered around, having lunch , its probably the best thing to do. ^^ 

Gathering with my secondary school choir friends @ pavillion yesterday 

Its been a long while since i saw them. Had a wonderful night @uma rani where all our memories flash back~ ^^ 

It tot i was the only one who gaved up singing. But. I guess everyone couldnt find the passion of singing anymore. Except for "xianyao" who is still living his dream~ And he's great, without any doubt. 

We all love you and will support you ~~!! Ga Yao~~!! 

Its not my fault that we've been apart. 

So stop making people believe that it is my fault. 

I have the right not to do whatever damn thing that i do not want to do. 

and this include contacting you. 

Because it will mean a lot of trouble to me. 

You weren't the same person anymore too. 

You know what have you done , nt to me but someone who cares and love you too. 

So. You dont have to explain what have i done to you because i know what am i doing. 

Introducing~~~^^

Onion Boy~~~!! 

The recent Cholomie ~~~!!

Substitution.

For so long i've been.
Everything that i am, Everything that i wanted to do.
Resembles someone that i couldn't ever possible to be.
And. Maybe. I'm just the substitution.

I just doesnt fit in.

I'm nt proud of myself.
I used to bt not now.
I know i can just hide all the feelings i have .
I've messed up tons of things.
Messing up my own life .
Sorry, i just doesn't really fit into these games.
I'm tired of trying.
I wanna be myself, but apparently i cant.
Jus tired.

我們那回不去的從前。

2011年接近尾聲了。
突然想想，問一下自己在活著的這21年來做了些甚麼。

小時候 ，總是個壞小孩，
不做功課，撒謊。
記得小學時，總是被叫到主任那裡去。
回到家裡，也不知自己到底做了些甚麼。
現在回憶起，如果那些時光能倒流，
我會努力的學我想要的東西，
想學鋼琴，小提琴。
那是我回不去的從前。


曾經有個朋友，至今我還欠她個道歉，我做了一件很蠢的事。
但我回不去了。
中學時期，
品行算不錯，但還是很魯莽，衝動。
自以為自己很厲害，想發威。自信滿滿的。
結果還是跌倒了。
如果能回到從前，
我願意謙虛的過活，我願意不那麼的愛現，
失去了，我能當一輩子兄弟姊妹的朋友們。
但，那是我回不去的從前。
初三，高一，有個朋友，為我撐腰，安慰我，鼓勵我。
但現在失去連絡了，我也不知為甚麼。
如果能回到那個時候，我也會在你身邊鼓勵你，支持你。
高中，我遇見了我一生中很重要的朋友們。
很感謝他們陪伴我，過了最有意義的一年。

有很多時候，我為愛情沖昏了頭，
年紀小小，妒忌心重，
弄得身邊的人都不好過。
現在想起，真不該太早談戀愛阿。
但諷刺的事，如果不是因為他，
我也不會有機會認識你們。
雖然說，我知道很多人都不喜歡我。
但是，如果我能回到從前，
我會好好跟你們相處。
我會好好的享受我愛做的事。不要那麼計較。
一直以來，唱歌是我人生中最快樂的事。
現在我知道， 這是我回不去的從前了。

上了foundation,
也遇到了對我很重要的朋友們，
也是我過得沒遺憾得一年。
所以沒甚麼好難過的。

大學生涯，也許我不該理會那麼多吧。
家家都有本難念的經。
每個人的容忍程度是不一樣的。
就當作，修煉吧。

既然回不去的，就向前看吧。
如果， 大家能原諒我之前的壞，那， 我們繼續當朋友吧。 ^^

PENANG ~~~~

Its almost end of the year, i wonder whether i had achieved anything in my resolution list in 2011.
Hmm.... *thinking hard* Nope. ==
I've been in Penang for 2 and a half months and everything's going great.
I've never tot of skipping college till now although class starts @ 8 in the morning.
Started my postings and i enjoyed it alot.
Completed OS, Perio, Pedo so far....... Hmmmm *most of the time i was in the library*
Hand scaling was a lot of fun as long as you don't get any old people who had not been to a dental clinic for 20 years. hahahaha....
Lecturers here are funny. And sporting too~!
PIDC CUP ended with swimming competition and our grp got 2nd for the overall events~~~~!!!
It was intra-batch this year and the seniors are so friendly~~~~
I really don get it when someone told me that its not fun because its not a batch thing.....
**WRONG CONCEPT**
Was able to know some of the seniors and they are really nice people.
I missed most of the major events as i have to go bek to kl for some particular reasons ==
But still GANGREEN rocks.
By the way, i learnt how to swim~~~!!
Everyday i spend almost 1 hr jus for swimming and its fun~~~~~~~
And i'm getting nearer to my target weight. *i hope 0.0 *
But, ITs PENANG. Means i get great food here , so.......... *guilty*
Hehe. K. Time for school. Bye~

Chubby Holidays~

I've spent 3 whole weeks in KL.
Seriously, Malaysia is the best country that u can ever find in this world.
Food in Malaysia is fabulous.
And i look so so so chubby right now~ 

With my fringe ~~ ^^
And my weight is jus at the border.
But somehow using the asian's scale. i'm so so so so overweight~!
Sigh~! And ppl~!! Stop making fun of my chubbiness.( _ _ x)
I shall show u all.
I will lose it~!! whee~~~
Starting with jogging ~~~~~~~~~~~
That reminds me of something very funny.
I thought of bringing my dogs out for a walk today.
they're so cuteeeee.... when i took the collar out all of them jumped on me~~
And lady barked at me. Its like she's telling me to pick her. Cutenesssssss to the max. (^^)
So i decided to bring lucky and lady out, BT, just as i step out of the house i regretted.
Its more like they're pulling me than i'm pulling both of them. so i decided to give up. Haha.
What a lazy owner~
Oh~ and did i mention how lucky got his name?
It all started when my cousin gave us the dog, poor thing.
Then my mom was asking my maid whether its a male or a female ( laki kah perempuan?)
My maid told , Laki~ My lil brother was jus beside heard and started to call the dog laki ( lucky) . Fun rite?
So now, we have lucky, lady and oreo~~~~~~~~
What a joyful family~^^

 K k, its time for dinner~
Gd Night~ ^^  


## I miss you lotz ##

NASI LEMAK 2.0

昨天心血來潮想說看套電影，
和朋友到one-u 看了nasi lemak 2.0 辣死你媽2。0.
黃明志的作品。
進去看是抱著“應該很好笑”的心態去，
結果整場戲就只有我們幾個笑個不停。
這電影很巧妙的用了三大民族的元素与
文化和我們生活裡很息息相關的笑點。
只是會忍不住想，政府竟會讓這電影上映？
看來，馬來西亞也不是沒救嘛。